Monday, January 25, 2016
Where I've Been
Well, I've been very busy. In a slow, almost catatonic way. Imagine a pacarana slowly lumbering up to near running speed. Recently my youngest child has been diagnosed with both anxiety and depression as well as a specific phobia for bugs. Managing her anxiety, and my anxiety over her anxiety, has become almost a full time job. And at the same time the iron has entered my soul and I have realized that I need to get a move on, as a post maternal person, and begin life outside the house and outside my role as parent. So today I have all but completed and submitted my application to an MSW program. This has revealed a huge rift between Mr. Aimai and myself on an important subject: commas. The poor guy has been editing my work, and falling asleep over it, since graduate school when I found him passed out on the couch having tried to read and edit my 540 page dissertation. This time around he only had to read an eight page "personal statement" and he was kind enough to actually look up the rules on commas. He painstakingly put them in only to have me reject about a quarter of them as just wrong. Even though, presumably, he is correct. So if I don't get into the SW program of my choice I will have no one but myself to blame. However, I intend to blame him. And his commas.
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Independence on comma issues is an essential part of a healthy relationship. Be strong.
ReplyDeleteI'm excited! And I should seize the moment to tell you how fantastic your Palin as Found Poetry piece was. Truly a bit of genius!
ReplyDeleteAw, thanks. And best wishes and regards to the child.
DeleteBest wishes!
ReplyDeleteMy problem isn't commas, it's apostophes.
My first language was Russian, and we put commas in way too many places. But we don't have apostrophes.
I hate those damn things!!!
"So if I don't get into the SW program of my choice I will have no one but myself to blame. However, I intend to blame him. And his commas."
ReplyDeleteSince you've put it "out there", it would be irresponsible not to.
Also, regarding your daughter, I'm pulling for you both. Please remember to be kind to yourself in this process.
"So if I don't get into the SW program of my choice I will have no one but myself to blame. However, I intend to blame him. And his commas."
ReplyDeleteSince you've put it "out there", it would be irresponsible not to.
Also, regarding your daughter, I'm pulling for you both. Please remember to be kind to yourself in this process.
Of course, he will understand that - it's a time-honored part of the husband's job to be always at fault in favor of the wife. Smart husbands understand this and learn to use it for their benefit. As for the commas, many of us realize somewhat early on that English as she is spoke (and written) is fundamentally a Big Old Cockup, and stop worrying too much about strict adherence to the Laws of Grammar. As a personal note, I'm a notorious control freak and yet I take a fairly free and easy approach to the whole thing (apart from the "two spaces after a period" rule, which is (I believe) one of the Lost Five Commandments that Moses dropped on his way down the mountain.
ReplyDeleteYour youngest child (and of course you both) has/have my deepest sympathy - my younger son has a very similar problem, which manifests in many ways: often night terrors/nightmares which involve kicking and punching. He went through increasing levels of stress in early high school that got to the point of auditory and visual hallucinations and scarily erratic behavior. Thankfully we were all able to ride it out without disaster, and we went and got checked out at the schizophrenia center here, where he was assessed as subject to a rather strong anxiety disorder, but short of full-blown schizophrenia. Counseling and certain medications (they have changed over time, as these things often do) have helped a great deal to bring it down to manageable levels, as has been his involvement in acting and writing. I wish you all well in getting this thing under some sort of control. It will hopefully become just another thing to live with, and it may well ease up as aging changes the hormone levels. Lots of hugging, support and affection helps in the process, but of course, you won't need any reminders of that.